“Have you ever thought of trying this colour? I think it would look good on you” “Why would you think that thing would look good on you? It sucks.” Or “What do you do, do you plan to explore further?” “What do you do, don't you think there are plenty of other things that could have been accomplished this whole time?” It's quite easy to recognise that there's a huge difference in both of these sentences in each example, right? Well. The mind that can differentiate and understand the tone, and the meaning of the sentence just by reading, often fails to understand while hearing the same thing from someone.(fails in the sense - of always being unable to understand the true intention of a particular person.) yes, I have the same kind of mind and I believe many of us do. Yeah, I mean sometimes, I just cannot discern the intention of the person, which causes me to doubt myself (self-doubt) and constantly overthink. It creates a very large kind of chaos in my mind, which I know is...
Growing up in Kolhapur thankfully made me a huge fan of festivals and who isn't!? I mean Indian Festivals themselves are huge celebrations itself. But I must say the amount of joy and enthusiasm we see among Kolhapurkars during the festive season is on another level. I just love to see the devotion of people towards Lord Ganesha. Especially for a 21-ft large Mahaganapati. I, too, feel an immense amount of positivity just by looking at the pictures of that idol. I love to observe people express their gratitude towards God in various ways, like Prayers with no superstitious beliefs behind them.
To capture the emotions, I decided to go with my brother who was going to take photos of a 21ft long idol of Ganesha. I had always been scared of such large statues/idols. But this time I decided to go and have a look at it. The beautiful deity felt even more positive in person! I could not let my eyes off it. I remembered all the memories we had with this particular place. I remembered seeing this idol for the first time. I remember we were all little kids in the car, and some of us shouted, “Look how big that idol is! I took a look at it for 0.1 seconds and closed my eyes tightly I didn't open my eyes till we reached the main road to home! I guess in the same week I had this weird yet terrifying dream which I could not forget ever! Here's what it was -
The dream
It was daytime. I was out with my family to see Ganapati. There was so much rush. So I was holding my Papa’s hands so tightly. We were walking along, and suddenly, there was shouting and screaming everywhere, and as I looked up, the large idol was slowly moving ahead towards me and as usual, I closed my eyes. The next thing I saw was it was all cement and dust around me and I was trying to get up. I saw my family rushing at some unknown car. I called and shouted but no one responded. I started crying. Suddenly, one person with the same moped as we had, came to me and asked if I needed any help. I felt relief seeing the moped and told the person my address, we headed to my home. We reached. I got off the moped and went to the door. But the thing I saw inside my home broke me down. There was some girl the same as me was took my place. My family was treating her like they used to treat me. She wasn't looking like me but it was clear that my family had replaced her with me. I ran towards Mom and hugged her. Also, my papa hugged me and asked if I was alright. I felt overwhelmed. My papa said, ” Let's drop her at her home” I agreed and the girl, my papa and that girl sat on the moped. I sat in front like I always used to. The next thing I remember is - that I was in the same spot where the idol collapsed; no one was around me, and the only thing I was able to see was that Papa was going away with the girl in my seat.
And then I woke up.
As a kid, it was such a horrible dream to be replaced or abandoned. In my childhood, I truly believed in God with all my heart. The fact that I still remember this dream made me think what this dream was actually about and I guess I kind of figured that out. In the dream, I chose fear, rather than trusting in myself and my family. I would have gathered all my courage and at least tried to save myself, but I didn't. So the action I took in the dream Emotionally was the reason I was stuck. Whenever the challenges come to you facing them bravely and not letting our emotions come in our way is the thing I learnt because of the dream. I looked at this dream very negatively as a kid, but now, when I look back, I look at it as a lesson.
Having a dream like this surely made me believe that the correct way of believing in certain things without any other one’s influence can shape your personality and guide you through your journey. We should think about whether The beliefs and the ethics we follow are genuine or if we are doing it to someone's fear/influence. Even if it is a spiritual energy, the God or a person. ๐ป
